Olaf the Fat


Olaf the Fat
Kicked out at a cat
And paused as his catarrh
Made him cough and splutter
And underbreath mutter
“bloody weather will be
The end of me
Thanks Odin for all that You’ve done…”

He trudged through the village
And clutterous bricolage
Toward the hall of his Lord
He halted and farted
“feckin’ wassail has started!
If they’ve drunk all the ale
Someone I’ll assail
Kick his arse from here to Valhalla…”

So this wretched old fool
Sat his butt on a stool
And called out loud for a pint
Seven or eight
(well, he had started late)
Drunk as quick as a flash
Ended up on his ass
Unconscious facing up at the roof….


Words: Martin G. King
Image: Irahi


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